Posts Tagged ‘community’

This morning I come across an interesting article while surfing the web and drinking coffee. The article is titled ten things you can do to make you happier. The article is really great and if you have the chance you should read it. The article goes into the science behind why these things make you happy. Happiness really is a choice and my doing these ten simple things we can choose to be happy.

1. Exercise more

2. Sleep more

3. Move closer to work

4. Spend times with Family

5. Go outside

6. Help others

7. Practice Smiling

8. Plan a trip

9. Meditate

10. Practice Gratitude

I am not sure about you but I was raised by a mom who suggested all these things to me as a child and even now when I call as an adult. Cut away to a call between my mother and myself…

mom: So good to hear from you. How are you?

me: I am ok…

mom: oh are you taking care of yourself I just finished Pilates you would like that (exercise more).

me: I run every day mom. I never really got into Pilates

mom: ok that’s good I never really liked running.  Are you getting enough sleep (sleep more)? Have you spoke with your sisters lately (time with family)?

me: I am sleeping fine. I spoke with Ashley last week. It is hard to get a hold of them.

mom: Oh she is going on vacation. Are you taking a vacation (plan a trip)? Are you still volunteering at church (help others)? Are you still going to church (meditate)?

me: yes to all it is all going ok too.

mom: well that is great it is so good to hear from you. Thanks for calling (gratitude)?

The call goes on but, you have suffered enough. I really enjoy my calls with my mom and most do not include that many questions. She does not make it a habit to nag me, but she does offer this type of advice. Mom is grown up and she loves me and so does your mom or mother figure. She has a desire to see you be happy and it seems for the most part that she is dead on about how to be happy.

So next time we think we are being mothered, maybe we can practice gratitude, say thank you and follow the sound scientific advice.





How to appreciate

Posted: April 19, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

Today is Friday and I am happy. I was also happy on Thursday, Wednesday, Tues, Monday Saturday and Sunday. I try to stay happy. I am not always happy. I was swinging a hammer some time ago and hit my thumb so hard that my thumb nail turned black and fell off. That moment was not one of happiness, but the day wasn’t ruined and I was happy on that day.

Yesterday I was speaking with a co-worker about how much time is spent by the North American worker at work. According to an ABC news report Americans work more than any other industrialized nation. The time varies but the range of time spent at work a week is estimated to be about 50 hours.  There are 168 hours in a 7 day work week.  If we work fifty hours sleep 6 hours a day the week only leaves us with 76 hours of our own.  If you absolutely hate work, you will be spending more than half of your adult life with that hate.

What is one to do? I hate work but I have to pay the bills somehow? At this point in our conversation our boss has over heard and stepped in with some wisdom that proves she should be the boss. “You may not enjoy all of life but you should appreciate it.” See? That’s kind of deep right. Being grateful or appreciative does not mean you absolutely love or enjoy what is going on. Being appreciative or grateful means you recognize the full worth of something or someone and you are grateful for that.


This concept of recognizing and being grateful for situations and people is quite profound! I really think this thinking can change things. Don’t get me wrong it is not good to sell yourself short. If there is a better job or position for you, take it. But almost every resignation letter I have read has some part about being grateful for the opportunity that the person had.

So it is Friday but Monday will be here and when it does and we get to feeling unhappy about it maybe we can acknowledge what it is and not find happiness but be grateful.

Just a thought

“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson




She is frustrated with work, life, family, pretty much everything. She drives to the bus station puts down her life savings at the window and tells the salt and peppered hair gentleman she wants a one way ticket to somewhere good. This is a scenario played out in the minds of people everyday all day. Growing up is understanding that we play a major role on how “good” or “bad” the place we live in is and that we can travel to the ends of the world and because we will always be stuck with us, we may never find some where good.

Being an adult means we understand and reinforce this everyday with every decision we make. So today let’s do our best by making good decisions in trun making where we live good, even if it is just in our little corner of the world.



That is my prediction for this week at work. See despite not working on Monday I feel that the team I work with will have the most productive week ever and I have one reason for believing that this will take place. We did not have a Monday morning meeting. I am not sure if you could tell this far into your reading but, I am not a fan of meetings. I think the brilliant columnist Dave Barry sums it up nicely.“If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.”

When we leave meetings we never leave with a sense of accomplishment, because, despite having power, words are not actions, and actions make the difference. Today be a man or woman of action. If you can skip the meetings and do as much as you can and make this week your most productive week ever!

 “Action is the foundational key to all success.” — Pablo Picaso




Walking home from school required a walk through the park. Sam usually never meet or saw any of his school mates on his walk home. Most of Sams friends were busy and the few that weren’t had rides to carry them home. The solitary nature of his journey home never really bothered Sam it was just always that way, so when Sam saw 3 boys his age in the park Thursday afternoon he was a pleasantly surprised. When Sam saw that 2 of the 3 boys were beating up 1 of the boys his pleasant disposition polarized and Sam felt a litany of emotion ranging from anger to fear and there was some compassion mixed in there. Sam knew that he being the second in this quartet evened the odds and would make the playing field fare so Sam jumped into the melee and the 2 bullies absconded. Sam walked his school mate home and he was sure the two would be friends for life, however the next day at school his new “friend” pretended that he didn’t exist at all. Sam was hurt and angry. When no one else would or could I helped you out and this is how you repay me? How dare you!

When we give or help out our fellow-man it can be easy to imagine this as an investment. We are giving our time and or money and very often both to a person. We expect to be repaid in one way or another by this person. I can’t help but think when we help with this type of attitude we are setting ourselves up for failure. I am not sure where you fall with the whole existence of a god thing however Mother Teresa believed in the existence of a god and everything she did was between her and God, not her and anyone she was helping.  


People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, People may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, People may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, They may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.” — Mother Teresa

So next time you decide to do good do good for goodness sake not for someone or something.



Well are you? I know it depends right? Are you reading this at work? If you are reading it at work, where do you work? How much work do you have to do and is today your Friday? Some of us will have a mountain of mind numbing work , colleagues we could care less about, bosses who seem like their number one goal in life is to make ours miserable and we have to work through the weekend so to answer the question right now no we are not happy. Answering preemptively; it is not looking good for us to be happy tomorrow.

So how do we fix this. Well we could quit work, write a scathing memo to our colleagues and employer and go out in a raging inferno, but the problem with that is we need our job as does pretty much everyone else in the work place.

A week ago at the company I work for quarterly meeting a happiness coach gave some advice on how to be happy.  The CEO of the company ran with this and sent out an e-mail with advice for working on our happiness. He gave some routines we could do for the next 21 days and the one that really resonated with me was “Happiness Habit #4” 

“For 21 days in a row, before you open your in-box or start on a project, send an email to someone thanking or praising them for something they did.  The email should be a MAXIMUM of two sentences and should take less than two minutes to write.  You can send it to a friend, a family member, a work colleague, an old teacher, anyone you know.” 

Now time for my confession, I haven’t done this yet because I have already opened my inbox and started two projects but tomorrow I already know who I plan on thanking.

Just thinking about thanking this person and how it might make them feel makes me happier maybe the happiness coach is onto something. I will let you know in 21 days. 

We rarely have control of who are colleagues and  employer are, but we can control how we treat others and treating others with respect gratitude and decency will make a huge difference in our lives.






on a side note todays post will be my 365 post to this blog!

stay tuned for a special announcement about this mega milestone…..



In a meeting we all sit at the table while the management stands to the left of his laptop, going on and on about the slides he is clicking through. We feel at times like he is speaking to us but most of the time it looks sounds and feels like he is speaking to the floor or the wall and at the times when he becomes accusatory.;”These numbers do not look good.” We feel that he is speaking at us. The speaker sets the tone of the meeting and the meetings tone usually determines if the meeting is effective or just another waste of time.

Meetings with a tone that is accusatory or boring or non engaging are useless. So the question arises, how do I make my meetings engaging? And, since I am not management and never will be conducting a meeting why do I care?

Well, allow me to of course answer the last question first. You should care because, despite not being management, you will meet with many people today and because you are not management, your meetings will be one on one. There is nothing worse than a bland, non engaging interaction that is one on one, except maybe for like snakes or spiders.


Now onto question one (remember I started with question two?) I would suggest that you speak with someone instead of, at, around, or to them. How do you know if you are speaking with someone well you should have input from the other person and enough input for you to develop a “feel” for how this person or this group of people feel about the subject of your meeting. Speaking with someone will, if you allow it change your interactions with people in a way you could never imagine. Speaking with and engaging people will open up a wealth of previously untapped resources and energy and just make life and work much more enjoyable and better. If you don’t believe me try it today in the hundreds of engagements you are part of.