Posts Tagged ‘happy’

Dont stop

Posted: April 11, 2014 in Uncategorized
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“Good songs to run too.” I type this into gooogle then click enter. I am rewarded with a list of websites from all kinds of running companies. The second click is the one that brings me to a site with ten songs 7 which are not already one my iphone, I have hit pay dirt.

I download four of the seven, because I am cheap, to my iphone. Out of the four one of my favorite songs is a rap song by the artist Eminem. The song is called till I collapse. I love this song because it’s message is to keep trying and never give up!

I would love to paste the lyrics here to this post but there are some explicit words in the lyrics and I don’t feel comfortable pasting them here.

These lyrics did make the decency cut though:

“Feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength

Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out
Till my legs give out, can’t shut my mouth.
Till the smoke clears out

This is your moment and every single minute you spend trying to hold onto it
’cause you may never get it again.”

I have written posts before about never giving up always pressing on and I will more than likely write posts again about the same subject. Endurance, there is so much to be said for that. I think the last line though puts some great perspective for endurance.

This is your moment and every single minute you spend trying to hold onto it
’cause you may never get it again.”


In Zen Buddhism the follower is taught how to enjoy and live within the moment.  When we start to accomplish something and set our long term goal it can be easy to become myopic and not enjoy or understand the moment. Right now is all that exists.   When we learn to tackle life one moment at a time we will realize our goals long and short term and live a full and happy life.

So what am I saying? Pour all you are and have into every task you take on and Never ever Give Up!






The secret is….

Posted: February 7, 2014 in Uncategorized

All I need to do is “get this raise”, “win the lottery”, “pass this course”, “finish my novel, screen play, play”, “get on the team” We all do it, don’t we. Not so much when we get older but it still happens. We look forward to the future and we see things that we think we need and we want and sometimes covet these things. Why does it happen? Is it ambition, greed? I am not sure what it is, but it seems to be part of the human condition. Seeking out a path to happiness, contentment. A visceral form of tranquility.  I know it seems that one cannot find visceral tranquility but that is what we want right? We want to fell alive and at peace. We just want to be happy and we are not always sure how to get there.

I am not sure what religion you practice, but I read an article about the Tibetan Buddhists, in of course, Tibet.  The article explained a  little about the isolation of Tibet and then went into some principles in the Buddhist faith that seem to be the secret to happiness. Now like I said I am not sure what religion you practice and I am also pretty sure that what ever religion you practice employs these same principles through one story or another as does Buddhism.

So the secret to happiness then is ……

Well to not try so hard relax and realize that you can only be happy by knowing who you are and helping others.

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need more specifics sure

Get intimate with your own mind.

Know who you are. Unplug from everyone and engage in healthy meditation and self talk. The more you get to know who you are the more you will like who you are, because you will work on parts you don’t like.


Practice compassion, at every moment.

This is a tough one. I am a Christian and at the center of the life of Christ was compassion. We are to love everyone. As a matter of fact the scripture used to teach Christians states that the most important commandment is to love God and others. That love should be for everyone to include the criminal. See it’s tough right?

Connect with others who support your journey.

Stay with positive people. Bad relationships can ruin a person. Stay with people who make you a better more compassionate person a introspective person and a happy person.  It seems like this should never happen. We should never stay with and spend time with people who do not support us or worse make us feel bad about ourselves, but it does. It can become a cycle too. I you are in this cycle I encourage you to find a compassionate way to break this cycle.

Embrace death — don’t fear it.

It will happen. Yep we are all going to die.

“Every man dies. Not every man really lives.” – William Wallace

Many religions have some sort of after life that they can look forward to after death. This no doubt helps tpo embrace death but it should not be the only reason to embrace death. A life well lived should result in a death that has been earned so to speak.

“Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once. ” Caesar

“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life.

Almost everything–all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.

Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet, death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it, and that is how it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It’s life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new.”
― Steve Jobs

So there you go how to be happy

Know who you are love your neighbors, get with wonderful supportive people (there are some really great people out there too!), and understand that this ride will be over someday and you should enjoy all of it as much as you can the gains and looses. The laughs, the cries, the ups the downs it is all part of what it means to be humans and people are amazing. You are amazing






How do I do it?

Posted: December 23, 2013 in Uncategorized

You want to be happy, so does everyone else. It is  a simple human thing. For some happiness is intrinsic to security and safety for others happiness means adventure and excitement, for others happiness is wealth and power. Well… not really. I just finished reading an article about scientific methods to improve human beings happiness.

Yeah that is correct. Scientific evidence for ten ways to be happy, and guess what?  Money, security and excitement were nowhere on the list. I don’t know about you but this really blows me away! I mean we wake up get in the car drive into work (a shorter commute did make the list, one thing to improve your happiness is to move closer to work, a long commute does major psychological damage effecting ones happiness.) and then work long hours for what? Money so that we can spend time with our family and friends.

Ahh there it is that was number 3 on the list. Spend more time with family and friends.   A study published in the Journal of Socio-Economics states than your relationships are worth more than $100,000: incredible right?

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Now if you have read the article you will know two things, 1. I cut and pasted that last comment straight from the article and two, that we already know most of the things that make us happy. We knew how to be happy pretty much ever since we were adults. I just think we have been sort of fooled, blinded by whatever you want to call it: consumerism, decadence, opulence. Whatever we call it we know that we cannot buy happiness but, doesn’t that new car look nice and we can buy it and get in it and drive around town and feel good for a while. But the feeling is fleeting. It is the holiday season. You and I have both bought some presents for people we love stuff that they will use and be happy and that is good gifts are good, but really what is more important the gift or the act of giving the gift?

I know they are borrowed cliches like; “it is better to give than receive” but it really is better to give than receive.  There is a wonderful book called “Flourish”, in the book the author, Dr. Seligman explains that

…we scientists have found that doing a kindness produces the single most reliable momentary increase in well-being of any exercise we have tested.


It seems after reading this article (you really should check it out) that, you can be happy and they ways to happiness are rather inexpensive but, they do take some work some effort some going out of our way for others. Some getting out of our comfort zones and finding the local theater or art gallery and then getting a hold of our family and friends and carting them their with us.

You really cannot buy happiness but we can earn it!





What time is it? Or better yet, what is time? Are you focused on present, nostalgic for the past or hopeful for the future? Time flies, time stands. Everyone process time a little differently. Saturday at a popular water park I found myself frantically looking for young Connor. No one knew where the toddler was. I knew where I had last seen him but he was not there. The minutes seemed to last an eternity. He was found and time fell back into it’s normal cadence I of course am assuming I had in my panic knocked a few years off the end of my life, but I will deal with that when I get there.

The fact remains that the existence of time is challenged  by scientist and philosophers alike. We can see effects on real and tangible objects of the abstract concept known as time. Gray hair, wrinkled skin, taller kids.

So whether it exists or not doesn’t really matter, the fact remains we are constantly moving through life. Call it time, the circle of life or whatever. What matters is that we appreciate this thing.  All aspects of this thing called life or time. Remember the past live in the present and look forward to the future. This balance of time and life will make and keep you happy.




My grand father would come home from work, change out of his uniform, do whatever chores he had watch some tv, help out my dad, uncle and aunt with their homework, get washed up for dinner. His home and work life had no business mingling together. My grandmother, dad, uncle and aunt had a glimpse of grandpa’s work life on bring the family to work day but other than that there was a hard boundary and distinct difference you had home and work. My dad works still in the repair business. My dad would come home from work change out of his uniform help me and my sisters with homework, do some chores wash up for dinner and sometimes there would be a call on his cellphone. Dad would leave dinner change back into work clothes and go fix the broken devices. Dad wasn’t always on call the company would rotate the on call shift, but the boundary was a little blurred dad drove home a van with his tools in it and the company he worked for name plastered all over the side of it. When I first started working for the company I am currently working for they gave me a company cell phone and lap top. I can read and send e-mails from my work cell phone and I can log into the company’s network from any internet connections using the work lap top. For me as with many modern-day employees there is almost no boundary at all between work and home life.


I am not sure if there was a moment when the culture shifted or if it was a good or bad thing but I am sure it has shifted. Since this shift has taken place I have an important piece of advice for anyone entering the work place. Learn to do something you love. It is a lot easier to work at home during your leisure time when you love to do something.

Choice, it is important. Choice empowers us and helps give us purpose. Choices define us and separate us from the animals. Instead of acting on pure instinct we can choose. We can decide today what to wear, when to wake up. What and when and where  to eat. We can pick were we live and how we live. Choice is something that we seem to be getting more and more of, everyday. Television viewing demonstrates the growing choices we have. You can pick between satellite, cable, internet and rabbit ears or for the brave all of the above. Food choices are as diverse as the people cooking and serving. It is not uncommon in one mall to see all kinds of food types. With all these choices some of us can get overwhelmed and forget the most important choice of them all. Every moment of everyday we choice to be happy.

Crazy when you think about it right? Some will argue that genes and outside influences make them unhappy and they cannot control these things and to a certain extent they are right, however they are also wrong to a certain extent. Last year in January I wrote about the time before soap was used in hospitals. Before soap a hospital stay was considered a death sentence, now after soap the hospital stay while uncomfortable is far from a death sentence. My reason for the digression and trip down memory lane is this. You can change what seems to be unchangeable, but not until you change your perspective.


We are ultimately the ones who choice our perspectives and happiness is not a place, or a moment it is a state of mind. I know it can seem like hope is gone. But here is another dirty secret. Your personal trainer, religious leader and school teacher will not tell you but the secret is you have to choice to be happy, and you also have to choice to find hope. 


“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
Abraham Lincoln
peace and be happy